The benefits of heartbreak
by icefairytales
Summary: Kawaki has the chance to move on and start something new with Sarada or stay in his old relationship.
1. Chapter 1

**Kawaki's pov:**

_Nothing is on my mind these days, I keep staring at the city, the nights are still bright even without you. _

_Tears fall from the sky they crash against the window but why does it feels like they are flooding into my room, forcing me out. _

_Gazing at the traffic lights I should cross but my mind is blank, it doesn't allow me to react, the moment I try to walk the lights are already red, so I keep staring once again. I hear my phone but I don't pick up calls I'm too busy for that. _

_Trying to live once again without you._

My banging door wakes me up, the realization that I'm wearing casual clothes hits me when I see that I slept on top of my blankets, shouldn't have done that.

"Hey dumbass are you alive?" someone screams as they keep knocking my door.

"I'm coming!" I raised my voice regretting it immediately, my head is killing me.

"Why did you disappeared last night?" Boruto asked, looking around my apartment " I know it's not my business and I'm not the cleanest person but you should-".

"Exactly it's none of your business" I grumbled, "I just went for a walk, I needed to take a breath"

"It was raining last night, did you really feel like it was a good time for a walk?" he questioned.

"You really came here just to annoy me?" I snapped at him picking up some stuff from the floor, "just leave, I have college in a few hours".

"kawaki"

I ignored him while I grabbed a towel to take a shower.

"Kawaki listen to me", Boruto said grabbing my arm "it's been months" he muttered...

"I'm okay".

"Look at yourself".

"Stop wasting your time" I uttered, "I'm fine".

He just stared, understanding that he couldn't help me. "fine, but tomorrow let's go out, you need some distraction".

"fine".

**Sarada's pov:**

_I wanna fall in love, I can picture how it feels, but why is it hiding from me? it's not for everybody?_

_I want to exchange my heart with someone else's, to keep it in a special place. _

_Peeking outside my window, trying to find you in an ocean of lovers, swimming away from tears falling from my eyes._

_It gets darker and darker as my loneliness tries to suffocate me._

_Clarity hits as falling leaves cover my sadness when they hit the ground, one after another. hours passing by, and when the rain hits me. _

_I'm finally clean. _

The only way to escape my sad reality of being single was by reading romantic books, and that's what I did and honestly, still do. Moving to the big city for college was the best decision, this is my first year studying literature and my hopes couldn't get higher.

"Hi cutie, how was your nap", I murmured to my cat as I got up from my bed and started my day.

My first week was normal, I got to know a lot of people everything is different from high-school I had different classmates depending on my class. It was pretty interesting, even if I had to focus on being the best student I couldn't help myself but look for someone cute or handsome, I'm the only single one from my circle of friends and even if it sounds stupid I hated it.

I wanted to know how it is to love, how it is to be loved in a way only a lover could do. I can't help but think it's my fault, there's something wrong with me but I can't waste my time on that, my thoughts always drifted in that direction.

"Great, it's only 5 pm and I'm already depressing myself", I huffed to myself as I went to my bed with a book on hand. When I got into the second chapter my phone received a notification.

*_sarada let's go out, I met this cute coffee shop down the street_*

-chocho

Chocho was my childhood friend, and we both got into the same college but we are studying different careers, even if we don't get the same classes anymore we still try to hang out together, I put on my cutest autumn outfit I had, going to a coffee shop involved taking aesthetic pictures for my Instagram. Looking outside it felt like it was about to rain so I decided to wear the fluffiest pale peachy sweater with a winter skirt and boots, don't judge me I will probably freeze to death, but I needed cute pictures.

**Kawaki's pov: **

18:00 pm and that dumbass still hasn't arrived, because I decided to wear black jeans with holes and a only a t-shirt with a leather jacket I was freezing myself so I got into the coffee shop down the street.

*_where tf are you_?* I typed as I sat in front of the big windows facing the cold streets, ordering a normal coffee.

*_I'm sorry I fell asleep! but you can drink something from that coffee shop while you wait for me_*.

"fucker", I murmured.

"Hey… is that seat taken?", a soft voice caught my attention as someone barely taps on my shoulder.

Not even bothering to look I just told her she could sit as I focused once again in asking boruto where tf he was.

*_Please don't kill me but I got something to do, I won't be able to make it, but you can learn how to socialize and talk to someone, it doesn't have to be a girl ;)_*.

"Bastard", I grumbled as I started to get up hurrying to go home, but I stopped when I hear the girl from my side chuckle a little bit, trying to cover up by faking a cough but failing miserably.

I stared at her amused for the way her face turns red as a tomato.

"Control yourself or your face will explode" I stated sitting on my chair once again, while she almost spilled her Americano all over herself.

She slowly looks at me trying to regain her strengths and says, "sorry, it's just I saw you all mad and cursing it was pretty funny, you don't match the coffee vibes at all". shyly smiling.

"Yeah… it's just I'm not on the mood" I answered, I stared at the window, there was a storm outside.

"clearly…" she ironically says "bad day?".

"We could call it that way" I exhaled "my friend forced me to go out, and now he won't come"

She took a peek at her phone and sighed, "well my best friend stood me up as well". rubbing her neck "I wasted my time here I should be studying for next week, I better go then."

When she stood up I said, "you should wait a little bit more, look outside." She took a peek to the window and immediately sat with a poker face.

"Does it always rain in this city?" she huffed ordering another americano but this time with a cake.

"Yeah… I mean this city is known for the rainy season that lasts almost the entire year." her order looked really good so I decided to ask for the same thing, "are you new here?".

She nodded as she took a sip from her coffee, "Yep, I just moved in last month for college, I'm still getting used to all of this", looking outside the window she smiled nostalgically and said, "everything is different from my old little town but different in a good way" smiling once again as she took a bite to her cake.

We kept talking for a half an hour waiting for the storm to calm a little bit, when it finally calmed down we decided to leave and keep with our paths. On my way home I felt an unfamiliar feeling, I kept thinking about her, we both study on the same college but different subjects, I was 2 years older that's why she had so much energy, it was hard the keep up with. She kinda reminded me of boruto, but he was way more annoying. She had this energy that makes you never get tired of her.

As my thoughts kept the same topic my phone ranged, and my whole world stopped when I saw who it was.


	2. Chapter 2

**Sarada's pov. **

"Pick up, pick up, PICK UP, PICK UP, come on chouchoou!" I screamed leaving the fifth voice mail in a row, I wanted to tell her everything. I couldn't believe that I had a casual conversation with the most handsome man in the city once we part our ways I practically ran to my apartment to scream.

I almost died of embarrassment when he teased me but after that, we actually had a pretty decent conversation, I wish it rained forever so we could still be there but anyways…..

It was getting late so I decided to clean my mind by getting ready to sleep, first soaking off the day in a hot bath then made myself a healthy dinner and started to write every detail about this day.

That's when all of my thoughts drifted to that guy, whose name didn't ask…

He had this raspy deep voice I could hear all day, whenever he talked about his life I got lost in his eyes and how sometimes his raven hair would obscure his view, I don't know if it was a nervous tic or he always did that but every once in a while he rubbed his neck with his hand, maybe he was tired, he did had bags under his silver eyes, not too noticeable but after a while, you could see them. And he told me we went to the same college I had to hide my happiness when he told me that, now I'm more motivated to go.

Damn…. Sarada are you really that lonely? We talked for a couple of hours, he is a complete stranger but I'm already thinking about him non-stop creating every fake scenario I can imagine, why do I always do this?, I better stop wasting my time and go to bed I will just talk to Chouchou tomorrow after class.

**Kawaki's pov:**

After today I thought I was finally returning to my life, I could start again, it took me weeks to gain the strength to go outside, to talk to anybody even pick up my brother's calls, all of my energy was drained by her, sometimes it felt like I would never be the same, I completely changed and at that time it didn't matter as long as we were together but now I asked myself if it was worth it, I mean I did all of those changes for her but she didn't see it. I wonder if she ever saw me.

I should give myself an award, one hour has passed since she texted me and I still haven't read it and maybe I don't think I should, it's not my obligation any more we broke up for a reason, but I can't help myself maybe something happened to her she never called or texted me anymore, but wait. What if she had an accident and she…. no, she only looked for my 'help' when she only wanted one thing. I better get over myself and just read it.

*_I need you._*

God I know her so well, of course, of course she was gonna pull out that text, this is her, she never wanted me, or missed me, did she even loved me?. It took me years to finally see it, and I can't go back there, this isn't the first time she texts me something like that but it could be the first time I ignore her. I can't go back, for months my friends told me it was gonna be alright and I'm finally believing it.

How can one simple quote have me completely at her mercy?.

Ignoring that famous text I went to bed, hoping tomorrow this issue was buried deep down in the past.

**Sarada's Pov:**

I woke up with a fluffy feeling in my neck Jiji my beautiful cat was sleeping on top of me, his purr was like music to my hears, he had my scent impregnated and I loved that, he has been my baby for almost 5 years, my parents found him alone in the streets and decided to bring him home, he was the best thing that happened in my life, so when it was time to leave my small town and come to the city for college I decided to bring him I couldn't leave him behind.

I did my best to get up from bed without waking him up, he could be really grumpy when I bothered him in his sleep, I barely picked him up so I could move to the side and dropped him again, I guess he was really tired because he didn't even move a little bit. After that cute surprise, I got ready for my day, classes were starting to get more difficult and I needed to pay more attention and study a little bit more if I wanted to be the top of my class like I always did if I can brag about it. I took a peek outside my window to see how the weather was, it looked a little bit cloudy but not that windy so I decided to go with a brown winter skirt with a pale pink knit top and in case it gets more cold a huge ocean blue double-breasted coat. I took a fast breakfast wasting too much time picking my outfit and ran to class.

After class I texted Chouchou so we can finally meet up and talk about yesterday's event, I wasn't mad at her for not showing up yesterday, obviously, at least thanks to my busy day I managed to keep my thoughts away from him but now that I'm free I planned to tell her everything, she's probably gonna say that it's all thanks to her, I mean in some way it is but thanks to my awkward personality he talked to me on the first place...

I instantly face palmed myself at the thought of that memory, I still get blushed when I think about his teasing.

"SARADAAAA", I hear my best friend scream nonstop from far away.

Oh god…. why does she like to embarrass me like that?, I turned my face as soon as possible to find her so she can shut up, but because there was an ocean of students leaving I couldn't see at all, so I decided to stand up in a higher platform and after a couple of seconds I manage to find her but as soon as I lift my hand to wave at her a strong rumble and a heavy rainfall started to pour. Every soul began to dispel running away from the rain and at that moment I realize I left my coat in the classroom and my books were starting to get wet so I rapidly went to the closest place where I could hide from the rain, the college rest area. Actually, my favorite place to hang out with friends, sometimes I think it's a place inspired out of a fairy tale, it's a huge green area with different kind of beautiful plants, in the center, there's a pool with a small bridge that crosses and it the end there's a gazebo where you can sit, bigger enough to even fit a hammock. I always see this place like a romantic one where you can bring your date, but right now I only wanted to leave.

I texted Chouchou begging her to bring me my coat, I was soaked but at least the books that were my priority remained almost completely dried. After a couple of minutes, she answered me saying that she was already on her way, I hoped she arrived soon I was starting to feel a little bit dizzy I wasn't used to this type of weather, the bench where I was sitting was comfortable enough to rest and close my eyes, my head was starting to ache until it reached a point where I thought it was going to explode, I felt someone tapping on my shoulder but I couldn't even open my eyes the natural light was too much for me.

**Kawaki's pov:**

Today's classes went smoothly, I had a lot to catch up so I just wanted to get home I couldn't afford to have bad grades. On my way out I ran into Boruto, he was hanging out with his group of friends probably talking about going out to take some drinks, he tried to persuade me into going with them but I was decided to get home, after a couple of minutes of chitchatting I announced my way out only to be interfered by a strong rumble and rain falling from the sky, as usual, the students started to leave faster but because the campus was overcrowded I decided to wait a while, I wasn't a fan of crowds.

When everything started to calm down a little bit I turn my face to ask Boruto if he wanted me to give him a ride now that there was a storm, but he was busy talking with a girl honestly almost murmuring so he didn't listen to me and I really wanted to leave so I just turned away to get into my car, the weather was really bad and I had a feeling that it was going to get worst at least I had my windbreaker that covered me from the rain when I was almost getting into my car an annoying Boruto screamed from afar my name, I almost ignored him but a part of me got worried thinking he probably didn't have a ride.

"Hey bro, I need your help!" a grinning Boruto pleaded

"Get in" I shortly said, thinking the ride was the help he needed.

"No.. actually I need you to give this coat to a friend, I would do it myself but I'm in a rush so take it" He said, handing me the jacket.

"What? I need to leave!" I exclaimed standing up too late to give him back the jacket, that dumbass was running away from me.

"SHE'S ON THE REST AREA, THAAANKS" was the last thing he heard from him.

Is he kidding? I thought, sometimes Boruto could get on my nerves. I stood there on the parking lot thinking if I should go, maybe this was a joke. I slowly got into my car to leave but something tells me that I should check there. Trusting my guts I leave and head over there hoping this wasn't just some cruel joke.

It was only logical to look out for her in the gazebo, that was the only place someone could be if they wanted to hide from the rain. As I got closer I started to feel bad for taking so long, she was snuggled in a bench completely wet, her face was covered by her hair and she wasn't moving I got a bad feeling about this so I ran closer to her, when I tapped on her shoulder to hand her the coat she didn't move, I insisted for a while not wanting to invade her space but she was starting the scare me, I moved her hair to check on her temperature only to realize something.

She was that weird-cute girl from the coffee place.

"Hey" I quietly said, trying to wake her up, "wake up, I have your coat" I tried to remember her name but nothing came to my mind, I searched on her coat to find her college pass or something so I could remember it.

"Sarada…."

"mhh?" she managed to answer.

"It's me, I don't know if you remember, we met at the coffee shop last night" I murmured, I guessed her head was aching due to her high temperature so I didn't want to startle her.

She didn't answer, after thinking for a while I covered her with her coat and my windbreacker and decided to call my dumbass brother, I needed to know where she lived so I could take her there at least. She couldn't even move.

When he answered me, I tried to wake her one more time but it was useless we needed to leave soon before the storm got worse so I decided to lift her, she felt so tiny in my arms and looked weak, when we talked last night I barely looked at her but now she was so pale, and all of her blood was on her cheeks, her hair made a complete contrast with the rest of her face, I wish she could open her eyes to have a complete picture of her but at the same time, I wish she didn't because right now I was acting like a complete weirdo.

Once we arrived to my car I laid her on the back so she could be more comfortable and started the drive to her place, in the GPS it showed that she lived really close to me, probably that's why we ran out to each other last night, after driving for half an hour due to the high car congestion we arrived at her apartment. Outside was the same girl from earlier, the one talking to Boruto, when I took Sarada out of the car she got closer and thanked me for getting her friend home.

"I'm Chouchou by the way, I'm her best friend" she said while looking out for her keys on her purse, "I was in a rush so I couldn't help her, I asked Boruto and he was busy as well but he told me you could help her" yeah right…. more like throwing the jacket and running away.

When we got inside I went directly to her room and laid her in her bed, I waited outside while her friend changed her clothes, and while I waited I took a peek into her living room, she had pictures of her and her friends hang around the room, apparently, the main color for her decoration were peach everything had that color, It gave a warm vibe. My apartment was the complete opposite, it consisted of only two colors, black, and grey. Inside was getting warmer and I was wearing a black turtleneck so I took off the windbreaker, while I sat on her sofa a fluffy cat appeared it was completely black and because I was a stranger the cat started to smell all over me, and after a minute it laid on top of me it smelled really nice like cinnamon and honey I wonder if that's Sarada's smell…..

"Hey kawaki, She's already on her bed, I'm going to buy some medicines, can you stay until I came back?", she said while putting her scarf. "You can make some tea, just look around her kitchen". And with that, she left.

What's up with these people, I didn't even have a chance to answer if I **could** stay, well if I said no I would look like a complete jerk and actually… I didn't want to say no, but it would be nice if they let me consider it...

When she left, I was about to stand up but I saw her kitty, it looked so comfortable on my chest I felt kinda bad to ruin that I checked if the animal had a collar with the name and apparently the cat's name is Jiji. Uh, that sounds familiar, it's not a common name for sure but I could swore I heard that name somewhere else, not wanting to waste too much time thinking about it I slowly stand up with her cat and decided to lay it by Sarada's side so she can have some company, when I got in her room I slowly sat by her side and drop the cat close to her.

I wanted to stay until she got better, she still looked pale, the redness of her cheeks disappeared a little bit. She had a cold damp towel wrapped around her head, every once in awhile I moved a little bit or added more water. I went to her kitchen for more water and I needed a cup of coffee everything was so tidy and when I came back she was slowly opening her eyes.

Her raven eyes were finally looking at me.


End file.
